Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Damn I already took my first MC for this term. Which only means that I can't get another one not until the next term. And how am I gonna get about achieving that when I keep waking up every school morning contemplating on skipping school. Whatever, I survived the one-MC-per-term promise last term. At least last term wasn't sucha bad ordeal. But this term is gonna be quite a challenge. And it really is not about the academic load ya know. It's the whole restrictive setup I'm down for. Screw afternoon consultation ok.The discipline talk yesterday was relevant but boring. I actually fell asleep during the last part of the talk. Because the DM tend to use profound words. And I do think he gets all poetic when it comes to lecturing us students about the whole right and wrong stuffs. So maybe maybe, we should not have lit teachers end up a DM ayyy. Or anyone with sucha superb linguistic capabilities for that matter. Coz they tend to use cheemologys that does not blend well in my system. Haa.As it turned out, I've been deluding myself. All along I'd though that I gained only five kg during the past two years or so. In reality, I actually topped up ten kilos. Coz the doctor told me about it just now. Damn. I should have known better. And the problem is prolly gonna get worse. So I came across this slimming programme thingy on the newspaper and I caught myself by surprise, coz for once in my life, I'm actually considering signing myself up for it. It is bugging me that this relapse I'm going through is going on such an endless haul. And I'm getting desperate. So it's wrong to feel that way. Coz appearance isn't everything afterall. But so what?! The truth afterall is far more conflicting than a looks-does-not-matter statement. It's just a statement meant to please but it does not work that way. Bleah. Plus I really hate not being able to try on everything when we I go shopping for clothes. Forget all the cheap steals at random heartland shops or bugis street. I'd never feel comfortable browsing for clothes in a shop unless I see a UK 14-18 somewhere on the racks. A sign that they have the big stuffs for the bigger girls. Unfortunately, they don't usually come cheap. Crap.Okaayy, prelims coming in about five weeks. I have little motivation left in me. And the DM mentions that about twenty precent of those from my school will make it to university. That constitutes about eighty of us in the graduating cohort? Ugh. How come the numbers are getting low? When I was in sec 5 they said that only about forty percent of us will make it to poly. Uhhh, okayyy nothing links here. Whatever. Point is, I hafta start working with thath little motivation I've left in me. I know I can do it. I wanna look forward to my convocation in about four years time!Oh, just to let you know, the pe department claims that those who are extremly overweight are excused from having to give a good performance in napfa. So, I was looking forward for a more intensive workout for failing my first few attempts. But now, it sure looks like they are not all that concerned. Coz I am in the list of the extreme overweight cases. And so it doesn't matter. So I'm failing this year's napfa after getting bronze for only three years. Three years, I tried proving my worth. Everything's gone down the drain. The school does not even have a TAF programme mind you. And I constantly skipped lunch time training. And I don't think that TAF and LTT are two of the same things. So there. I don't care anymore laa. MI and BDS are two different entities.Case closed.
Drifted Away @ 4:31 PM