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Sunday, September 09, 2007

I really can't take it anymore. The amount of anger I have against my dad's side is raging like a wildfire. I am heavily disgusted and upset. But what more can I ever ever do. Things have always been like this. I can't believe that they had the gall to ask my dad to pay for half of the cruise trip if I were to go when they fully sponsored my other two cousins. At this, I've no one else to blame but my dad. Right, coz everybody knows that at this point in time he has tons of money to spare as such it may not seem too much to ask for him pay for half the amount despite it being a supposed birthday treat. Like what the fuck?! My dad having to pay half the price of what those fools wanna give me as a birthday present?! And I guess I get even more worked up when I found out that my cousins need not have to fork out anything. Sure, they come from a family who's not financially well off. But at what levels do me and my cousins differ apart from our financial status? Do I have to be treated that differently? Why bother considering me as a blood relative then. Crap. And I swear yesterday's supposed birthday celebration was a major screw up I swear I could have cried there and then. What with my dad's possibly ignorant attitude and a whole bunch of relatives who couldn't be bothered to sing me the birthday song. Let me tell you that its was fucking embarrasing. And it's like the second year running that things turned out this crappy. I'd rather not celebrate it at all. Lets not even bother about the birthday presents ok. I am grateful to those few who bothered, really. But the rest of them were absolutely beyond me, utterly degrading. Now, you may think that I'm harping on issues that could be deemed superficial. Sure, it's not the celebration that matters, not the cake, not the present, not anything else. It's the thoughts that counts. But trust me when I say this, that no such thoughts would ever ever be present in the minds of those bloodlines, of my birthday or anybodyelese's for that matter. Coz as I have observed from year to year, that if my mum don't bother to host a celebration of some sort, none of them would even dream of even bringing forth their wishes. Somehow, there has to be kind of an incentive in order to bring them all to their senses to even remember my birthday. Like fuck them all ok. I don't give a damn anymore.


Drifted Away @ 1:18 PM